Still Tuesday 3 May

First be prepared for the photos at the end of this post, they were tough to take and I know they will. Touch all your hearts. When I spoke to Gramps in the morning he said what I expected, that the in home care was just too expensive, they would not be able to pay that much money just to have someone sitting in your house doing nothing. He believes that best option is to get out of the house and so they really needed to go back to the assisted living option they had agreed to before he got sick. Talking to Bruce would give us some information on how to get the most out of the house to support what they want to do. 

Gramps is feeling stronger every day, left the walker behind a few days ago, is hardly coughing now, still using oxygen but is getting quite comfortable with that. So this is bringing back his confidence as well and he is definitely making sure he has his say before anyone else. 

 Bruce Tognetti spent a few hours here this morning. He has a real estate business and is from one of the old families, has sold many of the family homes and sees Dad regularly at YMI.  At first there was lots of talk around selling, what you might get for the house as is and what you might get if you upgraded a few key items. But Gramps wanted to put forward the idea he had spoken to me about the night before which was about keeping the house and getting it ready for renting, thus keeping house in the family and getting some value from it. Bruce was really helpful in pointing out the pluses and minuses and renting definitely looks better option. N&G have now decided they will definitely go to assisted living and prepare house for renting. There is no time frame around it yet, Linda will have to all the first choice place they had settled on 3 weeks ago and see what is available. 

Gramps is feeling relieved and although Noni is not saying much I think she is on board. She just wants to be with Dad, does not want to lose him and is well aware how difficult living in the house is becoming. So while it will be hard, she is ready. Gramps has done a rough estimate on the numbers and more work will be done on that this week. 

Later in the afternoon we receive the offer from the assisted living place, called Attria. This is the placeLinda and Noni had settled on before. The rooms they wanted are still available. They have to pay deposit this week and need to move in by 30 May. So this is all going to happen sooner rather than later. Gramps is ready to go tomorrow but Noni we are less sure, however, she is ready. It is clear now that although she does not want to leave her things the house itself is getting her down, everyday something else that breaks down. And while she is incredibly innovative in dealing with these things, she is tired. 
Given that timeframe it does not make sense for me to leave on 17 May. I need to be here through the packing for relocation, installation into Attria and settling in period there.  So I am planning to wait a week and then likely I will change my ticket to a later date.  Jerry given that do you want to think about coming over? Not sure when might be best, you can think about it or talk to kids, etc. but I think I will struggle being here that long on my own. Also we are going to need levity, clear decision making skills and emotional support to get through this and I think you would bring all of that. Happy to talk more about timing. 

The next person we are talking to will be Mike Valencia the lawyer who has done work for Dad for years to see what implications are fo Family trust. So we have a clear objective now and it is all systems go. 

Last little bit on photos, forgot that I had already sent the scissors photos so repeats of those. The egg and tomatoe with oil and vinegar was one of nonis breakfast course this morning, gramps looks on in wonder/disbelief at what she puts together. Grooming before Bruce's visit, nap on bed in afternoon. Linda and I were in the kitchen and realised she had not reappeared so went looking for her.